The universe works in mysterious and sometimes overwhelming ways.
Turns out, I’m not going to do that beautifully crafted curse that I wrote last post. The person I was going to curse and I worked everything out. I don’t want to cause them pain. I was reminded of the reality of our situation. They are my best friend, first and foremost. Maybe we did some bad things to one another and put one another through a lot of shit, but I do love them. I could never curse them.
This is a bitter sweet thought.
I really do like that curse, and I know I have some pretty deep wounds from the relationship that I need address, but I just can’t curse them. We’ve worked things out so well I feel no need or want to. It’s such a good curse, though and I was excited to do it. Not to harm anyone, but to get some really violent energy out of myself. To be perfectly honest, my intention was never to cause my target real harm. I just wanted to get out the negative energy that the relationship pumped into my system. Now I feel as if it’s gone. Honestly. It all ended so well. There’s no hard feelings, we just aren’t what one another needs right now. Maybe in the future we’ll reconnect and our suspicions that we were made for one another will be solidified, but we both need to grow. We were holding one another bad. I was keeping him immature and coddled, letting him get away with anything and everything like a bad mother. He was pushing me too hard and disrespecting me, taking for granted that I did indeed have severe self esteem problems that meant that he could do whatever whenever and I was too scared to stick up for myself. We talked everything through, though. He’s still my best friend. I’d do anything for him still, but we aren’t going to force ourselves to suffer like this any longer.
So! Instead of that curse, for Beltane I’m going to be doing a bottle spell. After a fun night with some friends quite a few adorable beer bottles have come into my possession and I’m so excited to make them beautiful.
So instead of a violent curse, I’m going to be making self love bottles for myself and a friend of mine.
- A bottle
- Pink/White candle
- White/Pink thread/yarn
- Rose petals
- Basil/Bay leaf
- Orange essential oil
- Rose quarts
- Self love sigil
- Something associated with the target (In this case, a picture of Audrey Hepburn)
- A hand written note
Put it all in the bottle (Picture, sigil and note first) then fill in the space with the ingredients. Seal it all off with the yarn and some wax. Give it away! (Charge in sunlight.)